Sleeping Monkey

Don’t bother asking me who Lorraine Nicholson is because I have no fucking clue. I’d Never heard of her before 5 minutes ago, but what I do know about her is she has an excellent ass on her, and she is pretty cute. These pictures are of her on the set of shooting her new movie Soul Surfer, which I haven’t heard of either. A quick IMDB search tells me she is only 18, she has been in 5 movies, that apparently I have seen all of yet still never heard of her…. and wtf? She is Jack Nicholson daughter? I never even knew he has any kids. Shit a quick wiki search he’s got a bunch of kids. Hmm, you learn something new every day. Anyhow, yeah, pictures and such after the jump

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Word of advice to the producers of the upcoming movie Valentine’s Day:

You’re going to need to supply me with WAAAAAY hotter pictures than these of Jessica Biel if you want me to see your shitty movie. These are the dullest pictures ever

Not only does Rip Torn sound like a drunk retard with a cock in it’s mouth, but he also likes to spend his friday nights getting shit faced and trying to rob banks!

Torn, 78, was being held on $100,000 bond after state police responded to an alarm at the Litchfield Bank in Salisbury, the Connecticut town where the actor lives, and found him inside the closed bank “with a loaded revolver” and “highly intoxicated,” according to a police report issued on Saturday.

He was charged with burglary, criminal trespass and criminal mischief and weapons charges.

Torn, who won an Emmy for “The Larry Sanders Show” in 1992, has most recently appeared in several episodes of “30 Rock” as network head Don Geiss. He starred in the hit film “Men in Black” and its sequel, as well as scores of other films and television shows over six decades. He was nominated for an Oscar for “Cross Creek” in 1983, two years before his wife, Geraldine Page, won the Best Actress Oscar.

I guess those royalty checks for Freddy got Fingered and Down Periscope aren’t paying as much as he thought. And perhaps he should have taken notes when he was filming The Almost Perfect Bank Robbery. But he was probably too busy trying to bang Brooke Shields.

Although usually I just bitch about how much I hate such and such movie, but I’m going to say something good for once. If you haven’s seen it I would HIGHLY recommend seeing Eulogy. It’s easily in my top 10 favorite movies of the decade. Just pure awesomeness. If you have netflix check it out. Or if you are a cheap bastard and get your movies illegally off the net somewhere.

Holy shit, this movie looks like absolute garbage, but after seeing these still of the ridiculously hot Katrina Bowden (you might remember her from 30 Rock) I might have to break down and actually watch this shit when it comes out on DVD. She is looking sooooo hot.

You might not know who Amanda Seyfried is. She was in Mama Mia, and she was the chick in Jennifer’s Body that was not Megan Fox. I don’t know, there is something about her I find kinda hot. It might sound stupid but I think it’s because she is not TOO hot. She is like the type of chick who seems obtainable. She also has some big ole titties. Well she has this new movie coming out called “Chloe” which I’ve never heard of, and will probably never see. BUT she gets naked in it a bunch. And apparently our friends over in France are a lot less prudish that us pansy ass Americans, since they show nude scenes in the freaking trailer.

I’m sort of intrigued by this movie. Not sure if I want to see it or not.

Sweet Jesus the sick and disgusting things I would do to this chick. I’d even learn to speak Russian so I can talk to her parents. It’s weird, when That 70’s show first came on the air I was like, eww, she’s gross. Fuck fuck me sideways did she sure as hell grow up nice. Now days I’d easily put her in my top 10 hottest pieces of ass. And from this quote, I think I’m going to have to be seeing her new movie…

“It’s two girls making out, and guys have a thing for that. And Nat is like every guy’s dream. She’s a nerd’s idea of heaven. The whole thing is silly, but I can see why people care.”

Yeah, she makes out with Natalie Portman in her new movie, which should be titled GREATEST MOVIE EVER

Do you know what this picture is?

This is a picture from the new Karate Kid movie. Normally I’m not one of those people who cry my childhood is being raped when they remake things I grew up on. But fuck me I gotta call rape on this one. First off they replace Daniel was a black kid with cornrows? The kid is Will Smith’s kid by the way, so that’s pretty fitting. And Jackie Chan playing Mr. Miyagi? I seriously think I just died a little bit inside